The Power of Endings & Beginnings

There’s something quietly powerful and yet also ordinary about endings and new beginnings. The 90’s band Semisonic said it well in their song “Closing time” with the lyrics, “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

Even if January 1st is just an arbitrary day on the calendar, our nervous systems and stories treat it as a threshold—an ending that invites reflection and a beginning that whispers possibility. This symbolic pause gives us a rare opportunity to choose how we want to move forward, not just what we want to achieve.

But here’s the truth most people aren’t fired up, crystal-clear, or wildly goal-oriented for the start of a new year, and that’s ok. Resolutions tend to fail by mid-January. There’s even a name for it. It’s called “Quitter’s Day” and is usually by the second Friday in the new Year.

But you don’t need to have a whole resolution, or even stick to it, for your new year to matter. You just need an honest starting point.

Why Endings Matter More Than We Admit

Endings help us metabolize experience. When we don’t consciously close a chapter, we carry unfinished emotional business into the next one. Old disappointments, quiet resentments, unexamined wins all take up mental space. The New Year offers a collective permission slip to pause and ask:

• What actually worked for me this year?
• What drained me, even if it looked “successful” on paper?
• What do I want less of moving forward?

Before new beginnings can feel energizing, endings need to be acknowledged. This isn’t about judging the past year; it’s about learning from it. Reflection creates clarity. Clarity creates calm. And calm is fertile ground for meaningful change.

The Mindset Shift: From “Push” Goals to “Pull” Goals

Most New Year’s resolutions rely on force. More discipline. More willpower. More pressure. That’s why they often fail by Quitter’s Day. Even more so if you are already navigating stress or burnout.

A different approach is to create a positive “why” that pulls you forward, rather than goals that push you from behind.

A pull-based goal answers questions like:

• Who do I want to be more of this year?
• What kind of energy do I want to live and work with?
• What values do I want my daily choices to reflect?

When your goals are anchored to meaning, they feel less like obligations and more like invitations.

This idea is beautifully explored in Start with Why, by Simon Sinek. In this book, he reminds us that sustainable motivation comes from purpose—not pressure. When your “why” is clear, the “how” becomes easier to navigate.

Why Values Beat Resolutions Every Time

A resolution is often a single outcome: lose weight, make more money, get organized. A value is a compass: energy, freedom, integrity, connection, creativity.

Resolutions ask, “What should I do?”
Values ask, “What matters to me?”

Here’s why values win:

• They adapt as life changes
• They guide daily decisions, not just big milestones
• They reduce shame when plans need to shift
• They align effort with meaning, not comparison

For example, if your value is health, that can look like strength training, better sleep, walking meetings, or saying no to what exhausts you. You don’t “fail” a value—you practice it, imperfectly and consistently.

What If You’re Not Feeling Goal-Oriented This Year?

First: nothing is wrong with you.

Not every season of life is about expansion or achievement. Some seasons are about integration, healing, or simply catching your breath. If you’re coming off a hard year, your nervous system may be prioritizing safety over ambition—and that’s wise, not weak.

If traditional goal-setting feels heavy right now, try this instead:

• Focus on how you want to feel, not what you want to accomplish
• Choose one supportive theme for the year (e.g., “steady,” “spacious,” “aligned”)
• Let curiosity replace certainty. Clarity often follows action, not the other way around

You’re allowed to begin gently.

Actionable Takeaways to Start the Year Right

Here are a few simple, grounding ways to step into the new year with intention—no pressure required:

1. Choose a Word or Value for the Year
Pick one word that represents how you want to live (not perform). Examples:
ease, courage, presence, vitality. Let it guide decisions when things feel
noisy. In the past I’ve picked words such as Grateful, Unstoppable, Bold, and
Disciplined.  It reminded me these are
values I’m working on embodying, not just yes/no check boxes.

 2. Ask Better Reflection Questions

Instead of “What did I accomplish?” try:

• What
  energized me? (These are clues to your super powers)
• What
  did I tolerate that I don’t want to anymore? (These are often called energy
  vampires)
• Where
  did I feel most like myself? And with whom? (These are your place and your
  people) 

3. Design One Daily Anchor Habit
Not a full routine—just one small practice that supports your value. A 5-minute
meditation. A walk between meetings. A tech-free morning ritual or evening sun
down.

 4. Set Directional Goals, Not Rigid Timelines

It’s okay to aim without attaching hard deadlines, if those are getting in your
way. Direction creates momentum without anxiety. If you do use deadlines, make
sure you’re being reasonable. You’re probably not going to lose 20lbs by end of
the month. Even if you did, it wouldn’t be healthy or sustainable.

 5. Get Support When You’re Unsure

You don’t have to figure out your “why” alone. Sometimes it takes reflection,
conversation, and compassionate guidance to uncover what truly matters now, not
who you were five years ago.  You values
and why will probably change, because you’ve changed. You’ve grown. 

The bottom line

New beginnings don’t require a perfect plan. They require presence, honesty, and permission to evolve. Whether this year is about growth, rest, reinvention, or recalibration, it’s all valid.

And if you’re feeling stuck, uncertain, or quietly longing for something more aligned, that’s not a flaw. It’s information.

I’m here to help you listen to it—and to turn this symbolic new beginning into one that actually feels good to live.

Here’s to starting the year and perhaps listening to the words of the late Bob Marley, when he said, “beginnings are usually scary, and endings are usually sad, but it’s everything in between that makes it all worth living.”  He also sang, “every little thing is gonna be alright.” And I choose to believe him.

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And if you are too burned out and overwhelmed to even begin to use any of these strategies it might be time to get some help. Find a coach, therapist, or doctor who can help you reverse out of the physical, mental, and emotional symptoms of burnout so you can get back to living in healthy balance.

Remember, Self-care isn’t selfish…it’s required!

Yvonne Lee-Hawkins, IPHM, is a holistic Leadership and Wellness coach, stress strategist, and writer, who spent 20 years in corporate and leadership functions. When she is not working, she loves to go on nature adventures with her family, in the Pacific Northwest where they call home. You can find out more on her website, or follow her on LinkedIn, Medium, or Instagram.

If you want some help transforming your burnout into your strength, preventing your team from burning out, or with general wellness, schedule a call here.